Stop Romanticising Matrilineal Societies: Patricia Mukhim In New Book

Northeast India has always been looked at with respect for having matrilineal societies. Such a society or group adheres to a kinship system in which ancestral descent is traced through maternal instead of paternal lines or when the children of a particular clan take on the name of their mother instead of their father. This is one significant aspect but it is not the whole picture. In this kind of society, it is the daughters who inherit properties from their mothers and the tradition favours women to have economic precedence over men. This does paint an extremely empowering picture of women in such a society that’s deeply ingrained in the Northeast but what’s the reality beneath the surface? Social activist and journalist, Patricia Mukhim debunks several misconceptions around the subject in her latest book Waiting for an Equal World: Gender in the Northeast.

Demystification of the matrilineal society
Mukhim, a staunch advocate of freedom of expression and gender rights, writes about the prominent tribes (Garo, Khasi and Jaintia) which form a crucial gendered narrative of the northeastern land’s history in her book. It focuses on the Khasi matrilineal society but also intersects with and touches upon larger issues of gender in the neighbouring states of India’s Northeast, all of which follow the patriarchal order of society. She says, “The matrilineal society has a patriarchal worldview because matriliny does not mean anything beyond lineage from the mother’s clan line but there are so many subversive aspects of the society that disempowers women like they being abandoned, divorced and not paid maintenance and the rise in the number of such women. Women not having enough means to look after themselves etc. are also the sad reality of a matrilineal society.

There are several people who romanticise matriliny which is what I want to demystify and to give them the real picture of this kind of society and the status of women in it. They don’t have decision-making powers nor in politics or in society because in the northeastern society, the women’s organisations which are always under traditional institutions is very male-centric. So, women really have no space to air their views or to influence any policy in their favour,” Mukhim spoke in detail with SheThePeople.TV about her book.

She gives a deeper understanding into the functioning of the matrilineal system of society and notes that in such a society, the right to property and the house lies with the youngest daughter. “She becomes responsible for taking care of her parents, unmarried siblings who continue to live in the house and divorced siblings who choose to come back to the house. However, the gender roles are mostly intact in terms of the breadwinner of the house. Here, the husband only earns the money but hands it over to the wife to run the house. Whoever else like the brother or the sisters who continue to live in the house and are working will give their earnings either to the mother or the youngest daughter.”

Journalists can’t do quick stories on the matrilineal society
Mukhim says that the journalists and researchers who wish to do a ‘quick story’ on this kind of a society should understand that they cannot successfully show the various aspects of matriliny just by speaking to somebody for an hour. “They can only understand its underpinnings if they read beyond the headlines. For example a journalist will come and talk to a few people, go back and say this is a land where women are running houses while men are just ‘breeding bulls’. This is so not true as every decision within the families are made jointly,” she stresses.

Patricia Mukhim with her latest book

#MeToo impact on North-east
The #MeToo movement also had an impact in the Northeast when it spread over the entire country last year in October. We asked her about the impact that she has witnessed in the post-MeToo times.  “There is a lot of calling out happening in Northeast as well and people have become extremely vary of committing a crime like sexual harassment. Now with social media, everybody is empowered to raise their voice but the only setback is that one looks for a logical conclusion to such cases and one doesn’t see that happening,” responds Mukhim adding that organisations are proactively constituting Internal Complaint Committees (ICCs). But she points out that this is not a post-MeToo consequence.

Dire political representation of women
The political representation of women from the Northeast is a failed reality. In the recently concluded Lok Sabha elections the Northeast only had six women MP candidates from the seven sister states with no women contesting from Nagaland. Of these only two women won the election which is a very small number from such a large region. Shedding light on this she said, “At the moment it’s very tough for women to get into politics. Even when the amendment to include 33% women in Panchayati Raj came, Mizoram, Nagaland and Meghalaya were exempted because it was believed that we have traditional institutions but they are so male-centric. If women don’t have the opportunity to participate at the grassroots level where it’s easier to participate then it becomes very difficult at higher levels. Women who have got into politics or have won elections in the Northeast are those who are well-placed or who come from political families.”

What women entrepreneurs in the Northeast want?
She also spoke at length about why women in the region are failing to make their start-ups a success and the challenges they face. “There is not enough access to banking unless one is financially well-off or has collateral to give. We need micro-credit institutions in the Northeast who can hand-hold and help with book-keeping and help in other areas of the businesses at which women are not that strong. I believe these micro-credit institutions will go the last mile and will also aid them by providing step-by-step training to improve their start-ups, making sure that they are able to repay the loan and help them get an even bigger loan and then the women entrepreneurs can perhaps get an access to a bank loan. Our start-ups are very small scale and despite the fact that micro-credit is a bit expensive I still feel that they are much better for people to access.”

Speaking on the Mudra scheme, she revealed that it hasn’t reached the Northeast. “Only few women in the cities or town know about it but it hasn’t percolated to the villages.”

“The matrilineal society has a patriarchal worldview because matriliny does not mean anything beyond lineage from the mother’s clan line but there are so many subversive aspects of the society that disempowers women like women being abandoned, divorced and not paid maintenance and the rise in the number of such women.

In spite of everything what makes it worthwhile for women in the Northeast?
Talking about the silver-lining for the women in the Northeast, the author said, “Women there at least have social mobility and there is not much of a gender-based discrimination against them. Of course, the gender division of labour is sharp and same as other patriarchal societies but if a woman decides to go out and take up an economic activity, she is free to do that. In the Northeast women can move around freely at night and they don’t fear the pressure to conform. There is no social ostracisation of men and women wanting to mingle around in public which makes it a liberal society.”

(Source: She the People)

If you believe these 10 things about North East Indians, you're not only racist but also very ignorant

The thing with racism is it comes with very little shame associated with it. If you are at the receiving end of a racist attack, you are urged by people around you to laugh along because, 'joke hai yaar'.

Allow me to explain. I am from Assam and have been living in Delhi for the past ten years. A couple of days ago, I was visiting a friend. Upon finding that I was from Assam one of the people present in the gathering said, "Can I tell you something? Don't be offended." Now, I have come across enough people with no filter to realise where it was going, but even I wasn't prepared for this. "I have heard that you guys eat dog meat. Also that Assamese women are very good archers and that...uh... Assamese women pee standing," said the enlightened man.

While, thankfully, there we enraged gasps, I thanked by stars that I was at a place surrounded by friends. Usually, such comments get laughed off and if you are annoyed, you'd be asked to grow a sense of humour.

So I asked fellow Northeast Indian people the racist comments that they had to bear the brunt of. And most of these were masked as 'curiosity' or 'jokes'.

1. Trisha Bhuyan, 27, Assam: This was when I was interning with a reputed newspaper around 5 years back. The other intern and I were generally chatting, when I told her that I did my schooling in Assam. She said, "Assam?...er...there are schools there? Isn't it all jhopar pattis?"

2. Priyanjana Roy Das, 25, Assam: I was in Bengaluru a couple of years ago. Upon hearing that I am from a place called Guwahati, a very perplexed friend asked if it was in Kerala. But leave that, I have been asked if a passport is required to go to the Northeast. Till this day, I hope that she was actually talking about a permit and not a passport.

"Have you ever tried human meat?" I mean why, just because I am a Naga?

3. Precious Kamei, 30, Manipur: I am a Naga, from Manipur so I have heard a lot of ignorant remarks. I still get asked, "Have you ever tried human meat?" I mean why, just because I am a Naga? "Ise gussa mat dila, sab kuch khati hain...insaan ko bhi khati hain" (don't make her angry, she eats everything...even humans) -- this was supposed to be a joke. Our ancestors might have been head hunters, but mixing this up with cannibalism is just plain mean. I grew up knowing that I am an Indian. It was only after coming to Delhi that I was made aware that I am a Northeastern.

4. Abhilasha M*, 28, Meghalaya: I am an Assamese who have been brought up in Shillong. Although my Hindi has always been a butt of jokes, it is my looks that catches everyone's attention. "But you don't look Northeastern," I have been told over and over again, even a couple of days ago.

He then said that I don't look like I am from Northeast because apparently Northeastern people are supposed to be fair and I am dusky.

5. Richivandana Gogoi, 27, Assam: I was at my gym a couple of days ago, when the instructor decided to start chatting with me. "Aap kahaan se ho? Northeast? West Bengal? Kyunki aapke face se pata nahin chal raha," he said. (Where are you from? Northeast? West Bengal? Because I can't make out from your face) I replied I am from Assam. He then said that I don't look like I am from Northeast because apparently Northeastern people are supposed to be fair and I am dusky. He also said that the Northeast is a very dangerous place, which is why he has never been there.

6. Annie L, 33, Nagaland: This was last year in Bengaluru. I was mansplained that Northeast was inherently wild, until someone civilised came and turned it better. What does that even mean?

7. Richa Barman, 39, Assam: This was during my college days, so it has been a while. I was asked if I was a member of the extremist outfit, ULFA or if any of my relatives were.

8. R. Konyak*, 30, Nagaland: Once a college friend asked me if my house in Nagaland is made of bamboos. I was patient and replied that we don't live in tree houses. She took a couple of minutes to take this new bit of information in and said, "But I thought you all live in bamboo houses."

"Oh you are from Nagaland? I thought you are from India".

9. E. Kharraswai*, 33, Meghalaya: For starters, I don't think people from the "mainland" can differentiate between a Manipuri or a Naga or a Mizo. They believe that all the tribes are same and that we are all Nagas. So, naturally, there have been a number of times I have heard ignorant stuff but there is this incident that I thought was the epitome of all things ignorant. A junior from college and I were sharing a rickshaw to college, when she asked me where I was from. I said Meghalaya. She replied, "Oh, that is in which state?"

10. N. Tzudir, 20, Nagaland: When I moved to Delhi for my undergraduate programme, in my first week at my hostel a girl said, "Oh you are from Nagaland? I thought you are from India". When I gave her a piece of my mind, she clarified, "I meant from Delhi, Punjab, MP, you know."

*: name changed as requested

(Source: HuffPo)

A woman from the Northeast writes a powerful letter slamming racism in India

“Demanding me to lick his boots, he said, you deserve it only because you are a dirty tribal from the north east”. - Higio Gungte, Arunachal Pradesh.

I am an Indian, an optimist Indian, albeit a critical one. Today, after 25 years of contemplation of society and self, I claim I am a despondent citizen of India. I started as an optimist, however that lasted a short while, when the racism and its consequential prejudices by those who I called my own made me an Indian sceptic.

My first encounter with the animal called Racism was in India, in my own country. Racism wore superiority with pride. It walked loud and bold in the streets, in the shopping malls, in the airports and everywhere I walked.

But I met it, up close one evening in one the subways of Delhi in the year 2009. As I walked into the packed metro, I was rebuff by many eyes and disdained at my presence, their eyes examined me. Jittery, I turned away to one of the corners, only to allow my space felt corrode by two men slowly, but surely advancing.

They offered me money and it ascended – asking me discreetly: “how much do you charge for the night?” I was stunned at the question and didn’t know how to respond. Yet I did! Gathering courage, I said, “You should watch your words!” Well, he reprimanded, “Why don’t you go back to where you belong!”

Well 2009 onward, racism and I had a frequent encounter – someday for coffee rather light but most days, like a morning breakfast, extensively heavy.

On my first visit to the prestigious Jaipur Lit Fest, my friends and I, all Indians but yes, from the northeastern part of the country, were denied entry into a hotel, and were asked to ‘prove our nationality’ on arriving at a hotel. The manager demanded that he see our passports! We asserted we were Indians! We all speak excellent Hindi, and thought that it would just suffice. I mean, does it even matter?

Since then, I have been looking for home!

Through this article, I speak from, and of, and to, my country; to speak of a prerogative, gambled by few of my fellow Indians, for reasons known to them and unknown to me and to my brothers and sisters from the eight northeastern states of India. I write to speak of the county, the states and the cities, and of the many individuals and identities that come with it, conditioned by the colours, features, names, languages, foods, songs, dances and others. Most vividly, I write to question on the idea of ‘Indianness.’ Honestly, I don’t even know if this word exists, but time has taught me that such ideas have dwelt here, uncontested. And some of us have lived here, at risk, unfree, assaulted and erased.

Hate Crimes and Dharnas
Slogans like – Racism down down! We want justice! We are Indians! are almost an everyday tune to our tongues now. One does not need to be reminded of the many past incidents of racial attacks and its similar bigotries perpetrated to certain communities of India, that do not fit in the ‘Indian’ design.

Either one is ‘not enough Indian’ or rather ‘you don’t look like an Indian!’ On January 29, 2014, when Nido Tania, a 20-year-old student from Arunachal Pradesh, was murdered in the Lajpat Nagar area of Delhi, it triggered widespread protests across the country. Many political parties joined in and some of them also assured, there will be no more Nido Tanias and atrocities of similar kinds.

But, only few months later in October 2014, there were two separate but parallel incidents, one in which a 26 year-old engineering student was beaten by three men in Bengaluru for not speaking Kannada. Second, where two students from Nagaland, Awang Newmei and Aloto Chishi, were beaten and tortured brutally for hours by few local men in Gurgaon. What’s terrifying is their intent. The perpetrators then chopped off one of their hair saying, “We want to send a message to all of you in the northeast. If you guys from Manipur or Nagaland come here, we will kill you.”

These are only few of the incidents; there are so many more – brutal and inhumane in nature. Besides, many of us are fighting a battle every day, trying to find ways to tackle the incessant subtle cynicism that we are subjected to almost every day.Yet another attack

March 15 and 16, 2017, another protest-peace march was organized. Once again the old slogans like, ‘we want justice!’ ‘racism down down!’ Took over the streets of Bengaluru, Delhi and Arunachal Pradesh. Reason? A criminal lawyer, Mr. B. Hemant Kumar (Landlord) in Bengaluru thinks that tribal people from the northeast are best kept at his boots, preferably to lick them.

I am aghast at the incident that happened on March 6 on a young boy named Higio Gungte from Arunachal Pradesh, a college student of Christ College who was a tenant in one of Mr. Hemant’s buildings for almost a year.

I am sad to learn about the physical pain and the emotional trauma this little boy was inflicted with over a petty issue – excessive use of water.

Gungte’s family is closely related to mine, and after the tragic incident I had spoken to both his mother and sister. From their long conversation, one thing that troubled me was the question his mom asked me: “What wrong has my son done to him (landlord)?” This is a clear case of Racism – a hate crime and an FIR has been lodged against the landlord at the Hulimavu police station in Bengaluru but he is out on bail now.

Allow me to share with you few important details from the FIR in Gungte’s words.

Dated- March 13, 2017
To,
The SHO,
Hulimavu Police Station,
Bangalore 560076
Sir,
I, Higio Gungtey, would like to submit that I am a person belonging to the Nyishi Tribe, a schedule tribe of Arunachal Pradesh. A copy of the certificate is produced for your kind perusal. Hemant Kumar has attacked me for no reason but because I come from North East. I and two of my friends are tenants in his rent house since March 2016, with the rent amount 12000 per month and the rent agreement was made in the name of my friends Mridupawan Bharali and Rajeev Ranjan Singh (hailing from Assam and Jharkhand respectively). He told us that my name need not appear in the rent agreement. It was on Monday March 6, 2017 our landlord Mr. B. Hemanth Kumar came to our house and he started attacking my friend while I was talking to my parents over the phone in the balcony. When I saw him dragging my friend by his neck, I immediately rushed into the room and tried to stop him but instead he started beating me. He beat me mercilessly in all part of my body. While beating me he said, “you dirty tribal from North East”.

He kicked me in my stomach several times and I was choking and fell down on the floor because of the severe pain. In no time, again he kicked me on my chin and it started bleeding. My tongue got cut and it was too painful. Then I went to the bathroom to spit the blood out, he dragged me out of it and hit my right cheek, it was too painful. My mouth was full of blood. He punched me in my face. I was already very tired from the beating and dragging. He tried to kick my genitals as well but somehow, moved and escaped.

Mr. Hemanth told my two friends to slap me otherwise he will beat me more. As a result my two friends out of fear of him started slapping me.
While he was beating me, he abused verbally saying, “I will fuck your mother and sister”.

He forced me to lick his boots
While he was kicking me with his boots, one of the boots came out. He ordered me to put it back to his feet and tie the lace, and lick his boots. While licking his shoe he said, “You only deserve it because you are a dirty tribal from North East and don’t show your face again in this city”.

Please No More!

I felt my heart skipped a beat when I read his FIR. I was disappointed and disturbed by both the actions of Gungte’s two friends and Mr. Hemanth, but much more by Mr. Hemanth. He is an educated man, a lawyer by profession. Gungte, in his wildest dreams must have never imagined that he would be ever treated like that. Only if one could read MR. Hemanth’s thoughts.

You see, no man is disturbed by things, but by his opinion about things. And I fail to understand, why does he hate the ‘tribals from the north east?’ I also struggle to reason out why Gungte’s friends (roommates) gave in to Mr. Hemant’s threats. If only they could have gathered some courage, things would have been relatively calmer for Gungte and his family.

Gungte’s noiselessness is very familiar to mine and many of us who are told every day we don’t belong here. His voice is the offspring of many nations within a nation. And together our voices carry the many unheard stories of racial discrimination and its intolerance.

I believe, more than ever that the search for justice is the supreme foundation for activism in our time here and abroad, although the melody of misery and anguish has been consecrated in this country. I draw strength from the traditions of all brothers and sisters who without fear and inhibitions have dealt with racial discrimination and its biases; with every reason, have stood firm in their fight, and most remarkably to those who have lost their lives in the pursuit to finding one’s identity like Nido Tania, Richard Loitam and many more.

But, when we condemn attacks in Kansas (shooting of two Indians’ thinking they were Iranians) and Canada (Quebec mosque shooting) why do we fail to dismiss this one? They say when the horrors and pain of the people are louder than babies crying and when the cry of your neighbours make you more uncomfortable than murder itself, something is awfully wrong. And It’s time, that India, where differences were once accepted and celebrated, should introspect on this before it is too late and before our attitudes harden.

Let me end it here:
The idea of home is so complicated to me; home isn’t here
people look at me like I am from somewhere else.
Where is home?

Writing became an expression of my discomfort
a language
an arrangement of unbroken rage
writing poetry to question
why?
Poetry to reclaim my identity and to be
home
again.

My body is yellow, white, brown and black
Is it my skin that betrays or is it my face?
I am still looking for an answer!

You tell me
How do I respond without making you angry and uncomfortable?
How do I wear a mask that doesn’t even fit me!

Do you feel my pain?
Why can’t you, my fellow Indians respond for me?
I want all of you to speak for us.

What are words if they aren’t realized?
And realization is a distant dream
A dream to be an Indian
and here I am living despite it all
with a language that comforts me
in a language that sounds familiar.

I write to all the younger version of me, you are
already
home.

Even the colour of my dreams scream
Indian
my blood is Indian
my bones are solid Indian
so, I am writing!
I am protesting as I write
I am protesting about being an outsider in my own land.

But, why am I still looking
for something that will define me?
I can’t find my belonging here.
You will often catch me and many of us
searching for it
In the books and in passports
striding
with resilience.

(Written by Ngurang Reena)

(Source: The Better India)

Why Northeast is a safe haven for solo female travelers

In 2013 Bina Lakshmi Nepram was featured in the list of the top 100 most influential people in the world on armed violence reduction.

The national media immediately had their eyes set on this young woman from the north eastern state of Manipur. With every word she spoke, she surfaced the ground realities of Manipur and the other North Eastern States. It was possibly the conviction in her words that encouraged me to finally indulge in an understanding of the culture and social organization of the North Eastern States of India.

Positive Facts From The Seven Sisters 
Cases of violence against females slowly making to national news in India leading to a growing awareness and intolerance against such incidents. At the same time when we reevaluate the situation in the Seven States of the North Eastern India, there are some positive statistics to look at.

Why Northeast Is A Safe Haven For Solo Female Travelers
We owe it to the strong women of these seven states who have asserted themselves well in the social space and have earned a position of respect and goodwill. You will see women in local shops as breadwinners for the family, as public actors, as activists and as entrepreneurs exercising their rights, duties and choices. Wherever you walk, you can sense the power of female presence all around you.

For a solo female traveler in the Northeast, their sisters guard the territory. 
Northeast gives you an evident picture of how women share social space in these states with a lot more confidence and comfort than we see elsewhere in India. The Khasi community in Meghalaya is the world's largest matrilineal society. Women have the right to seek divorce and the youngest daughter of the family inherits the property.

In Assam the women working in the tea gardens are considered the best tea pluckers and these women are mostly also the sole bread winners of their families. The social status of women in general makes public spaces more comfortable for women.

Khwairamband Bazar, The Mother's Market of Imphal
Since more than 100 years women at Khwairamband Bazar run the Mother's Market in Imphal. In Manipuri, 'Ima' means mother and 'keithel' means market. More than 3500 women vendors sell food items, utensils, clothes and handicrafts irrespective of their community. This market is a powerful assertion of strong female presence in the region and says a thousand words about the status women have earned for themselves in the region.

Among The Seven Sisters, Nagaland Stands As The Safest For Women
The positive statistics on female literacy and rights indicate the strong awareness of women's rights which are mostly traditionally enforced. Nagaland tops the charts in being the safest state for women where the the number of reported cases of crime against women is as low as 110. In the same list, Uttar Pradesh and West bengal are table toppers.

(Source: Tripoto)