10 words that English needs

A young man named John Koenig was trying to write poems. However, some emotions seemed difficult to express in words. He had the idea of creating words for these previously unnamed feelings in a dictionary. Thus, The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows was born. He began a website and a web series on YouTube that introduced his words to the world. Now, people everywhere can contribute to the dictionary.

Ten of The Coolest Words
The dictionary has over a hundred entries. Here are ten of the most intriguing invented words. To which of them do you relate the most?

Lachesism is the desire to experience disaster—a hurricane, a plane crash, a shipwreck, etc.—in order to disturb the smooth and predictable path of your life and “forge it into something hardened and flexible and sharp.”

Exulansis is the inclination to avoid relating an experience until the memory begins to feel foreign to you.

Avenoir is the wish that memory could flow backward. The image conjured is of a rower facing backward in order to see the path that he is leaving. So much in life now is anticipation for the future. What if we could anticipate the past?

Altschmerz expresses the weariness you feel with the same old imperfections and worries. After “gnawing” them so long, they become “soggy and tasteless and inert.” Are you so tired of your flaws that you would welcome a fresh issue? You have experienced altschmerz.

Occhiolism is the acknowledgment that your perspective is truly limited, so much so that you can’t make any real conclusions about anything.

Liberosis is the desire to care less. If you worry about strangers crossing the street, whether the postman will bring the mail on time, and if you will still have all your favorite things in five years, you might wish for liberosis.

Vellichor is the odd melancholy and longing of secondhand bookstores. Aren’t they “somehow infused with the passage of time”? Think about it; all the characters whose stories you’ll never read in your lifetime. What thoughts captured will never be set free from their paper prisons?

Rückkehrunruhe describes how you feel after a long journey. The memories are so fresh, but already they are starting to recede as your everyday life rushes in to reclaim you.

Gnossienne is the flash of awareness that you really don’t know the people that you thought you knew best. Your spouse, your friends, your family members have a mysterious side of them that you will never fully discover. It’s like “a door locked from the inside, a stairway leading to a wing of the house that you’ve never fully explored…”

Anecdoche occurs when everyone talks but nobody listens. Each speaker contributes, but none of the pieces add up to anything. Eventually, there’s nothing left to say and anecdoche is over.

Can you relate to these obscure sorrows? Have you experienced your own unique emotions? You need not leave these sentiments unexpressed. If there is no word, invent one and submit it to John Koenig’s website. For those who long to see a book version rather than read about these feelings online, a book version is scheduled to be released in 2017. Wait a minute; is there a word for yearning for the texture of paper in your fingers in these increasingly paperless times?

(Source: Grammarly)

My mom got me married to my lover and now I'm not even allowed to see her

I've been in love for 12 long years and been married for the last two years. I don't know why there is such a big void still in my life. My husband's family never respected me for who I am. Since the day I got married, all his mother wanted to know was how much gold her daughter-in -law brought with her.

My family was asked for gold and other gifts for the son and his younger sister as a 'token of love' for letting me marry their boy.

It was always about materialistic things and amidst all of this, the man I loved for a decade stood silently. Not a word came out of his mouth. When I confronted him, he told me that such things were managed by the elders of the house and there was no need for me to "overreact". In fact he told me it would be an insult if I didn't get all the things my family was asked for.

We had known his family since forever and that made it even harder for us to understand this horrible behaviour. As a single mother, my mom did everything they asked for, which involved spending 15 lacs of her savings. This included buying furniture for my new house! As my mom and in-laws stay in the same city, whenever I wanted to visit my mom's house, it was mandatory for me to first visit my in-laws to satisfy their egos. Only then could I go see my mother. At times if I didn't do that, I got a call from my husband asking if I visited his parents.

On the flip side, he never took my permission when he visited his hometown to see his parents. And I never complained.

His father being an alcoholic talks about everything in the world sitting next to me, he doesn't care about who is at home or who is listening. He sleeps and drinks all day, and still has a respectable position in the society, I haven't even tried to tarnish it. There is always a fight in the house about something or the other.

There is no love and mutual respect for each other in this family, my husband being the eldest thinks he is the sole responsible person for the whole family. Am I not responsible for my family the same way?

Instead, I'm always told to please his irresponsible parents while abandoning mine.

The whole family has a lot of things to talk about and they discuss it privately, when I am not around. When I ask my husband about it, he says it's not related to me or him and I shouldn't bother. If they didn't want to involve me in their family matters, why did his mother lie to me saying,

"This is your family now, you will stay here only"?

When my mother-in-law got married, she used to stay at her mother's home all the time and enjoyed every bit of her leisure time. Shouldn't the same rule apply to me? I am questioned when I wear jeans and t-shirt. I am told to wear a sari at all times. It's obviously not the most comfortable attire to wear all day everyday.

One day I broke my silence and told her — "It is our life and we both decide what to wear, eat, drink, and where to stay" and she's got no rights to question my dignity or respect.

Since that day we haven't spoken with each other but I know that she is instigating my husband against me. At times he argues with me saying that his mother is right and I just don't care about her. Now I'm just giving time to my relationship. I don't want the 12 years to go a waste but that doesn't mean I will wash my hands off my self-esteem.

(Source: Akkarbakkar)

Qatar launches online service for expats to calculate end of service payment

Ministry of Administrative Development, Labour and Social Affairs recently launched a new online service on its official website for expatriate employees. This new service allows individuals to calculate their end of service payment according to the number of working years he spent at the company.

Expats have to enter data in accordance with the contract signed between him and the employer: that includes the joining date at a job, and last working date, the basic salary and gratuity days accrued for each year (payable days per year -- for example 21 days for one year). This service was introduced to ensure greater transparency and to make foreign employees aware of their rights.  

The end of service benefit is calculated under the Labour Law No. 14 of 2004. This is the link to calculate your end of service benefit: http://bit.ly/2kdvHYE

(Source: The Peninsula)

It costs $233,610 to raise a child

If you're thinking of starting a family, you might be in for some sticker shock: Raising a child could cost you nearly a quarter of a million dollars.

A middle-income, married couple with two children is estimated to spend $233,610 to raise a child born in 2015, according to a report released by the Department of Agriculture Monday. And that number only covers costs from birth through age 17 -- so it doesn't include college expenses.

Families can expect to spend between $12,350 and nearly $14,000 a year, on average, to raise a child.

Housing was the biggest expense for middle-income families, taking up an average of 29% of the total cost of raising a child, driven mostly by the cost of an extra bedroom.

Food is the second biggest budget eater.

Another big expense is child care, which costs parents an average of $37,378 per child, according to the government.

Despite the endless cycle of diapers, children tend to be less expensive in their younger years. While child care and education expenses are higher for children under six, those expenses often dissipate as kids get older and enter school full time. Transportation, food, health care and clothing costs all rise as children age.

For example, parents with teenagers can expect to fork over the most money on food. The annual average cost to feed a 15-17-year-old came in at $2,790 in 2015, 22% more than the cost to feed a child between the ages of 6 and 8.

Transportation costs can also weigh heavily on a family's budget, but they dropped 7% from 2014 to 2015 thanks to lower gas prices.

Costs vary by family income level and location. Lower-income families are estimated to spend an average of $174,690, while high-income households will pay around $372,210 over the years.

By region, families in the urban Northeast face the highest child-rearing tab with an average of $253,770, followed by the urban West at $235,140. Those living in rural areas throughout the country pay the least, at an average of $193,020, according to the government.

Parents in the urban Northeast also spend the most on housing and child care and education.

Siblings can reduce some budgetary pressure. Married-couple households that had three or more children spent 24% less on average per child compared to those with two kids.

"There are significant economies of scale, with regards to children, sometimes referred to as the 'cheaper by the dozen effect,'" said Mark Lino, author of the report and economist at the Department of Agriculture, in a press release. "As families increase in size, children may share a bedroom, clothing and toys can be reused, and food can be purchased in larger, more economical packages."

The good news is that growth in child-rearing costs slowed a bit. Costs rose 3% -- or $380 -- in 2015 from the year before, short of the 4.3% average since 1960.

(Source: CNN)

Abandoned and abused by Kerala husband, UK woman waged a 2-year battle for justice

Thirty-three-year old Mariam, a British citizen had landed in Kerala’s Thrissur district in February 2015 in search of her husband Kunnumbath Noushad Hussain. Two years and many trips later, Mariam is set to return to her home, her battle half -won

Mariam had met Noushad Hussain when he was a student in August 2011 and after being in a relationship for two years, they married in April 2013.

A year later, Noushad left for his home in Thrissur. Mariam kept waiting for that call from Noushad telling her that his family had accepted her, but it never came.

Instead, Noushad stopped taking Khaliq’s calls, and did not respond to messages either. He also blocked her on WhatsApp and Facebook.

 Desperate calls to his parents were met with animosity. She learnt about a helpline for women ‘Snehitha’ run by a local Kudumbashree group in Thrissur.

 It didn’t take much time for Snehitha’s lawyer Sudha Haridasan to locate Noushad.

Mariam and Noushad

“Although he first denied any relationship with Khaliq, Hussain later said that he married her just to get a permanent UK visa. He said that she was five years older than him and that he could not live with her,” Sudha had told The News Minute in 2015.

This was no easy fight, but Mariam was never ready to give up.

Her first visit to Naushad’s home in February 2015 was a traumatic one. She was called a prostitute and not allowed to enter.

“They called me a prostitute. They abused me very badly. I pleaded with them but they refused to talk to me,” Mariam said.

The case soon went to a local court, but there too Noushad called Mariam just an acquaintance. The determined woman got an order from the court allowing her to live in her husband’s home, but she was never allowed.

Meanwhile, Noushad married another woman in July 2015. His new wife too was scornful of Mariam.

Mariam kept coming back to India, hoping for justice.

And a battle for months, Noushad finally agreed to pay her alimony.

“I am going back next weekend, there is nothing more here,” said Mariam.

 “When she first came here, her only intention was to live with him. She never agreed for a settlement by giving alimony, but since he remarried and there were no other options left, in a meeting with local political leaders and Noushad’s family, we agreed for a settlement,” Sudha added.

(Source: The News Minute)