Sex worker-turned-author basks in glory of Kerala film award

 Noting that experience makes a person strong and bold, she said it was plenty of her experiences-whether good or bad, that made her capable to fight all odds and reach this stage of life.

It has been over 15 years since Nalini Jameela shocked the conventional mindsets of the society and upset the patriarchy by penning a path-breaking autobiography on her daring and frightful life as a sex worker.

Since then, she has been enjoying several identities in life raging from a best selling author and activist to gender expert and social relationship counsellor and now at the age of 69, she is a recipient of the prestigious Kerala State Film Awards. Jameela adjudged the special jury mention for costume-design in the movie “Bharathapuzha”, directed by Manilal, when the state government awards were announced here on Saturday.

For Jameela, it was yet another unexpected twist which the life had in store for her and she was bold enough to say that the lessons she had drawn from her early life as a sex worker was her base for any new achievement. “The state award was really unexpected…It was for the first time in my life that I did costume designing for a movie. I cherish this honour as one of the greatest achievements in my life,” Jameela told PTI.

Asked whether she would like to build a career in costume designing, she said she was not sure whether any mainstream film makers or production houses would give her an opportunity and if anything comes her way, she would definitely give it a shot. (Express photo by Janak Rathod)

Noting that experience makes a person strong and bold, she said it was plenty of her experiences-whether good or bad, that made her capable to fight all odds and reach this stage of life. “Bharathapuzha revolves around the story of Sugandhi, a sex worker in her mid thirties, hailing from central Kerala district of Thrissur.

Actress Siji Pradeep played the central character in the woman-centric film, which deals with several gender issues.
“While chosing costumes for the character, I actually saw myself in her… me as a sex worker during my young age. I never used costly sarees or ornaments in life and I do not even like to wear a bindi. I tried to reflect those characteristics in the heroine’s physical persona,” she said.

Jameela also said while designing outfits for the heroine and helping her with the mannerisms and body language of a young sex worker, the dreadful memories of the grim past came flooding back.

“I spent days with the film crew, especially the heroine, to provide all support they needed. There were scenes in the film which I could relate with that of my life…,” the activist explained. It was her long-drawn friendship with Manilal, the director, that brought her to the tinsel world.

When he had discussed the project with her, Jameela never imagined that she would be entrusted with costume designing. But, she made up her mind to take up the new challenge and managed to complete the work as per the expectations of the filmmaker. “I worked according to my own perspectives. But, the happiest part was that the director was convinced about what i was trying to say.. He had given me the liberty to follow my mind while designing and selecting costumes,” the elderly woman added.

A third standard drop out, Jameela was forced into prostitution at a very tender age following the death of her husband who had succumbed to cancer. While running from pillar to post to look after her family and raise her two daughters, she had no option but to take up sex work as a profession- which the conventional society viewed as immoral and unethical. The years-long life as a sex worker, police brutality, attack by goons and endless physical tortures inflicted by “clients”, has only given Jameela an added energy to fight the hardships and shatter the taboo attached to sex workers.

Before turning a sex worker and started loitering in bus terminus and railway stations soliciting ‘customers’, she had worked in brick kilns and domestic help to earn daily bread for her near ones. When she published the ‘Autobiography of a Sex Worker” in the year 2005 after retiring from sex work, it fast turned out to be one of the best sellers of Malayalam besides kicking up a widespread debate on the plight of the hapless community.

After the first book had been translated into several languages including English, she came up with another one “Romantic Encounters of a Sex Worker”, a memoir which revolves around the relationships she developed with the ‘clients’, in 2018. Besides being a member of several NGOs, she has also been working as a gender and social relationship counsellor and taking classes in colleges and universities on the subject.

Asked whether she would like to build a career in costume designing, she said she was not sure whether any mainstream film makers or production houses would give her an opportunity and if anything comes her way, she would definitely give it a shot.

She said the changed perspective and empathetic approach of the new generation towards sex workers and the LGBT people is a great solace for the community members. The 69-year-old woman also cherished a dream of bringing out the cinematic adaptation of her autobiography and setting up a care centre for elderly people. “Those who came from streets, worked in mud kilns and toiled in someone’s backyard as a domestic help will surely have a great strength and courage to fight the odds and shatter the taboos of this patriarchal society,” Jameela concluded.

(Source: Indian Express)

Book Review: The Autobiography of a Sex Worker by Nalini Jameela

Nalini Jameela lays out an interesting and powerful narration of the patriarchal oppression faced by women through her own experience as a middle class Ezhava woman who became a sex worker because of poverty. Born into a middle class family near Amballoor, Ernakulum, Nalini did not have the privilege to gain elementary education and was pulled out of school in class three.

Due to the extreme poverty caused by the loss of her mother’s job, she started working at the age of nine in a clay mine near her house. She faced sexual harassment at work multiple times. At the age of eighteen, she was thrown out of her house by her violent patriarchal father. She got married unceremoniously to a co-worker who had taken her in and lost him to cancer after the birth of her children. She was compelled to take up sex work in order to provide for her children with no support from her in-laws and conjugal family.

The Domestic Sphere – A Violent Patriarchal Sphere
Nalini’s account is a fierce presentation of the domestic sphere as violently patriarchal. At different stages of her life, she observed and reflected upon the violence that women are subjected to in the domestic sphere. Her mother’s and her own experience revealed contradictions embedded within the domestic sphere quite clearly to Nalini.

In Nalini’s family, patriarchal power rested in the hands of her father who was an ex-army man and a Communist. Her father’s association with the Communist Party led to her mother losing her job at her spinning mill. Not only did this make Nalini’s mother and ‘her’ kids economically dependent on her husband, but it also made her mother lose her confidence in questioning his authority. This taught Nalini the relevance of economic independence at an early age and also made her develop a strong sense of self-respect. Not only did she start working at the age of nine but also stood up for herself and her daughter when she lived with Koyakka (her second husband).

NALINI’S ACCOUNT IS A FIERCE PRESENTATION OF THE DOMESTIC SPHERE AS VIOLENTLY PATRIARCHAL.

Further, Nalini stood by her brother’s decision of marrying someone of his own choice. This got thrown out of her house by her father for expressing her view, and she did not even receive any support from her brother either. In his entire life, Nalini’s father never stood up for her mother and repeatedly beat her in rage. His authority was never questioned and not so ironically, was only passed onto her brother.

Through this book, Nalini reveals the ways through which even women become invested in patriarchal ideology. For instance, Nalini’s father was influenced by his sister-in-law to abuse his wife. Further, when Nalini’s brother became the next patriarchal head of the house, his wife began to scrutinise the actions and movements of Nalini’s mother. This is not only restricted her movement but led to lack of privacy.

Nalini’s own observation and experience revealed that patriarchy makes the domestic sphere violent towards women, wherein patriarchal ideology becomes etched within the everyday lives of women. However, she tried to question male authority in her own life.

Morality As A Tool For Obscuring Patriarchal Oppression
Nalini ridiculed the various moral opinions attached to sex work. Through her work, she condemned the constant attempts to shield the internal contradictions of a patriarchal society that uses tropes of morality. She suggested that the people who compel women to take up sex work are the first to accuse them of being immoral.

THE PEOPLE WHO COMPEL WOMEN TO TAKE UP SEX WORK ARE THE FIRST TO ACCUSE THEM OF BEING IMMORAL.

Men as Clients
She explained that the attitude of clients have not changed over the years.

“There’s no change in their attitude: “I’m a respectable individual; you are a whore.” They never arrive at the realisation that they are clients.”

She pointed out that men (her clients) not only consider themselves as morally right to demand sex from an unknown woman in return of money, but condemn sex work as immoral. The sex worker is disrespectfully viewed as a “whore” (which projects women as mere tools for sex) by her clients.

Nalini had her first experience as a sex worker with a police officer (who she described as an extremely handsome man). The next day, she was picked up and brutally beaten by the police. She highlighted that the same group of people that ask for sexual services are the ones who punish them for being sex workers. In addition to this, she pointed out those men who claim themselves to be patriarchal heads – the harbingers of morality and protectors of women in the family – are the ones who come to her for sexual advice and services.

Co-Workers, Sex Work and Violence
Nalini shared the story of Sabira, a co-worker who spoke at a seminar in front of legal experts and Presidents of the State and National Women’s Commission, regarding the working conditions of sex workers and the need to fight for their rights. A few days later, she was picked, beaten and tortured the whole night by the police. She died from the wounds inflicted on her.

Nalini also mentioned the stories of two co-workers who committed suicide due to feuds with their families. This and many other episodes that exemplified the violence faced by her and her co workers are etched throughout her experience. She fights for the cause of sex workers’ human rights and has raised her voiced multiple times against patriarchal oppression and state negligence against the lives of workers.

Therefore, her account shows us that in order to build a feminist analysis on the experience of a female sex worker, it is imperative to critique the violence embedded in patriarchal structures and reflect upon one’s investment in it. Nalini not only questions male authority but also reveals the internal contradictions embedded in spheres that affect the lives of women. Therefore, any political organization working with rehabilitation or sex workers rights must challenge violent patriarchal oppression every woman faces in their everyday lives.

(Source: Feminism in India)